The German Health System...

As if I haven't spent enough of my life in a hospital...
Well, those of you who have me on Facebook, will know that the other day, whilst attempting to cook.. I decided to totally ruin the top of my thumb with a knife.

A ceramic Knife!

Well, normally,  I try to laugh off injuries...  but - it was bleeding pretty badly.. for 30 minutes
The Irony behind it all is, that I bought a New knife, because I know - being a Scout for however many years - that blunt Knives can be dangerous.   I bought a ceramic one - which are ridiculously sharp, but also look like plastic to be deceptive (see right)
Anyway.
The offending Item that I was cutting was an Onion, ready to go into a Pasta - My dad will know exactly was I was up to!    My old knife was a tad blunt. When I say blunt.. I mean that butter was a struggle for it.  so I bought this new one.  I really wasn't used to how sharp it was - ans, having made sure my fingers were safe - I applied the same amount of pressure as I am used to (with a blunt knife)
The key word in the previous sentence was fingers.

I went straight through the onion (impressively well actually) and then straight into my thumb (again, Impressively well actually!)

Bleeding started.
Bleeding escalated

I have had first aid training (it is , at the moment out of date) so the first thing I did was whack it under the running tap .. well, this made it look like John Cramer has been in my flat (for those of you who don't know the name - he is the guy from SAW) and it wasn't helping the bleeding much., though it was sorting the pain out a treat.
So - I used my first aid know-how and went straight to the Pressure thing.  What did I use?  well..  A SOCK!   This was no ordinary sock.. It has just been in a wash with towels by mistake - so it had been boiled!  so it was Clean (ish) or cleaner than anything else anyway - and likely to hold together for longer than Bog-roll..

This is when I decided to go to Hospital...   I don't know the number for the ambulance here - and learning it is tempting fate - but I wasn't going to ring them for a bleeding finger - so, sock now tight and in hand, I was off on the 30 minute walk to the local A&E department..

Nice walk - the slight "going into shock" thing wasn't too nice, but I got to the hospital.  A&E was empty...

Now - Imagine ..
You have just had the minor panic of cutting your thumb that hasn't stopped nor slowed down the bleeding for what has now been an hour and you were in a hospital in a foreign country .. and you had to explain the problem.
Well.. the Nurse came, she smiles and said "Bitter Schön" (which is the |German way of saying "can I help")
Well, my sock had now born the brunt of about 45 minutes worth of pretty serious bleeding, and was now just dripping onto the floor..
I told her, in my bestest panicky German...   "Ich habe meiner Daume Geschnitten"  or 'I've cut my thumb'

She realized at that minute that German was not on the cards and said "Well, I am your guardian Angel - I can sort your thumb, and my american husband means I can speak English!"     Get in!

She then proceeded to do all of the paperwork..  she explained that, though she would love to do thumb first - its not possible to administer treatment until there was the paper work done !  (well, yes.. Im in Germany!)

Luckily, I had my wallet in my coat from a previous trip to the bank that day - oh - and to buy the bloody knife! so I have my EHIC and Insurance card with me :D

So - with not a single other patient - I was introduced to a nurse who only spoke German..who began to treat my thumb - by now, I was a bit more chilled and had caught my breath - so German was working now..  but - as the English speaking nurse was bored - she came in to help too...

It was all really good - apart from the German one asking if I had brought the knife with me...    because I clearly carry blood - covered kitchen knives around with me at night!

I was Glued (which failed) and stitched... bandaged and sent on my way - and told to go and register at a doctor to have it checked in the morning.

After he Hospital...

I just had to go home now...   and clean up all the blood from the floor
Today, I registered for a Doctor...  What a farce!

I went into town at 12, thinking that all the morning rush of people waking up Ill would be over - and people will not have fallen over in their lunch break yet.
Well, on a Thursday in Germany, you can apparently only be ill on on a Thursday during   9am-12PM and 5PM-7PM

well, I misse the 12 part, so loitered until 5 in coffee shops  (caffeine overload!)

I got in a 5:05PM, where the cue was out the door!! but I got to the desk at about 5:15, so not too bad - I registered (which the nice receptionist did mostly for me from my ID)In Germany, you choose your doctor.. She asked me to choose by saying 2 names..  and nothing else..  I was first like "it doesn't really matter, i don't plan to visit again! She told me i had to choose, so I went with the guy whose name was easier to pronounce!  Herr. Doktor Wagner. (now imagining some shite x-factor dropout!)  How she expected me to choose with just a name I ave no idea - don't get me wrong, I did't expect a powerpoint of their credentials or anything..  but its like.. whats the point??!   Then.. it was time... went and sat in ...

THE WAITING ROOM...
Oh my god..  This is the weirdest room I have ever been in...

Not the actual room.. but nor far off!

In German doctors surgeries , when people walk into the waiting room, they almost announce themselves with a "Guten tag" and we are expected to say the same back!  WHAT THE HELL!!   In the UK, talking in a doctors waiting room is Strictly forbidden!! but walking in an greeting everyone!!  This would explain the weird look I got when I walked in..  I did not greet the Ill people..

Also, the waiting room was just like a Mr. Bean Sketch:
-  man with a beans tin stuck on his hand
- a woman who was clearly there more often that the furniture
- the guy who makes a point of turning the page on his magazine
- the people that know each other, who have met by accident and describe their symptoms in Extreme detail and very loudly ( all im saying, I definitely spoke the least amount of German in that room.. and I understood that I didn't need to know about that part of this lady..so..  yeah...)
- That person's whose cough get worse the longer they wait..

Honestly..this was the clientele of the waiting room tonight - It was just odd.. with every walk of life crammed into what was clearly an old doctors office with some chairs in it..

Anyway..  I waited for about 35 minutes..  (I didn't have an appointment, so they just cram me in whenever)
I was then called into a room, were the same receptionist who has registered me, took my bandages off - I have no issue with this - I couldn't do it alone, and you don't exactly need  a degree to take a plaster off...

This revealed my thumb.  she asked me what the Hospital had done - which I explained (in German) .
She then just fucked off, almost yelling that she was off to find the doctor..  Great!

After the Bandage came off - stitching covered with strips

Whilst I was alone in this room..  I noticed the following...

- the sharps box was an old bulk size washing-up liquid fluid tub, with the top cut off
- the computer was logged on - and written in German and English .. if i'd have had sinister intentions..
- there were hoards of drugs (prescription) on the shelf above my head
- there were those stereotypical brown bottles, making it look like the hospital from the film Pearl Harbor!

the doctor shone a light on it - told me to go back Monday, took EUR10 off me , and left - after 2 minutes of looking at my hand, and 20 talking about why I was in Germany..   such a nice guy!

I was about to leave. when the receptionist came back.. and re-bandaged my thumb.. she gme me 2 spare bandages and then , as soon as she had finished said "bye!"

umm.. ok then..
The doctor then caught me on the way out, and said that the stitches are out on Monday..

(upside down) but what it looks like now - with a camp bandage bracelet!

so.. I loo forward to it...

going by the last few day.. I wouldn't be surprised if Mr Blobby took them out..


I have had to be so careful writing this.. Im kinda scared that Ill have written 'bondage' instead of 'bandage'

They say 'time flies when you are having fun', but this is ridiculous!

So. Im now towards the end of my seconds month!

This month has been quiet to say the least.  The first 2 weeks were in school, the second 2 are holidays.

Well, I had loads of plans for the 2 weeks - travel to Berlin, head to Hamburg.. but then at the start of the holidays, I had a 'brainwave' to pay 2 months rent in one go.
Next month will be great. This month, NO!!

Don't get me wrong, I haven't been left tight, just not enough to survive and go to Berlin and buy food - which, sadly, I still need!

So I am making it up by planning a larger trip during the 1st week in Easter/ But for now, its under wraps until its DEFINITELY happening, and its all completely confirmed!


But anyway, what have I been doing over the last few weeks, that have not cost very much?
Well, I try to make sure that I go for a walk once a day.  The weather here is great at the moment, so I may as well make the most of it - after all, its getting colder, and it could be my last chance before I have to go out wearing EVERYTHING I own (people who know me will know what I'm like with the cold..  It can be 30 degrees, if the wind blows at 29, I feel it!)

I was also asked to go to a park Its in Schlüchtern,but its pretty hidden.
Well, its a nice place to be ..

There is a playing field, a small play area.. Oh, and deer!   VERY TAME Deer..

 To make it perfectly clear..  The Deer are fenced.. yes but ..   the Humans have less space than they do!!  


It was pretty tough to get a photo, because they kept moving, and I kept getting a picture of their arse..  until one of the members of staff that I had gone with went all doctor dolittle on them, and made noises..!

  This guy followed us all the way around!

This was one of the younger ones.















Anyway it was nice! and good to see Human beings too!

Before the holidays, I had my 'big spend' of the month. (apart from the 2 months rent...)
I say 'big spend' .. It wasn't , but considering I had almost 3 weeks left before being paid..  I had to consider the future a bit!

Some of my students invited me to their (and I quote).. "school disco"
Now, despite being the DJ that the kids at my old high school still ask for in the hope that I am not at uni on that date because I (supposed to be) the best... (its always nice for a positive review!!)    I still expect a school disco to be terrible music, awful lights a DJ enjoying himself more than any of the guests and teenagers dancing with members of the opposite gender, but look like they are shifting a wardrobe!
So.. kinda like this..

Well .. it wasn't..

It was a HUGE rig...   about 600 people, and went from 9pm - 5am!  beer was flowing, spirits were flowing faster and, after being there for just 2 hours.. I ended up doing what I do best (and the answer isn't partying!)

DJ-ing!
well, not being the DJ, there was this kidda doing that who clearly had taken a disliking to me!  there was a word for him..   and it rhymes with 'Bosser'
Moving on..

One of my students was in charge of lighting. (which I do anyway..)  so, it ended up that we kinda shared the workload! :D

So, to be fair..
This type of thing would never happen in UK schools. EVER.. but they are stupid.. because this made SO MUCH MONEY!    They have asked me to DJ at the Christmas Disco..   er   YE!


There was another Major Event over the last week..  (notice the capital letters...)
to say its the best thing to happen so far, it a bit far..  but it is us there..
There was a special arrival to Schlüchtern the other day...

Yorkshire Tea makes Mike happy!

A colleague went to England (Whenever I say Colleague, I should probably point out that it is usually one of 4.. the rest are nice, but I don't have much to do with them , so its now worth writing about!)   but a colleague went to England.  She was there for 4 days and , as an English teacher, loved it. She even managed to catch the good weather that was about for a few days.

But, when I started here, she asked me what I miss the most about the UK..  my answer was 'Yorkshire tea'

well, she remembered.. and when she came back we met up.  I walked through the door, and she presented me with this 80 bag box of Yorkshire tea.  Well.. since then, I have been the happiest person in Germany !  its lovely.
I should probably also explain. that German 'tea' or what they pathetically refer to as 'tea' is like dishwater. dishwater that has been left overnight, warmed up by candles and had milk that is on the turn poured into is ..    its GRIM.
This was an awesome day.. until I took them home and realized that I had no milk, nor sugar and the shops were shut..    Im quite surprised that you couldn't hear me yell "BUGGAR" from where ever you are right now!

Just realized I have spent about 20 minutes talking about tea..  I definitely am British eh?



More news!  (This has been a month of little money, but news!)

(despite him running away during out early high school years) The one who remains my best friend SAM is coming over in April!   a couple of days after my birthday!   Well, I haven't seen him now in .. 3 years..  so to say that I am excited is a slight understatement!

Frankfurt, Kollegenausflug and the week ahead!

The Last week has been interesting.  Though I haven't really done much, at the same time, I kind of have!

Last week, I managed to Squeeze in more lessons that usual, just to help out a Colleague who couldn't make it into school.  I didn't mind, in fact, I really enjoyed it! :D

I have also got a lot of lessons to do for next week. I have booked myself to teach the full lesson for most of my lessons, which I am really looking forward to! :D  The lesson is the same for everyone, but it can be made easier or more difficult...

and it revolves around The Simpsons! :D


The main reason for updating this today, was to talk about Friday really.

Friday, was our Staff trip.

Now, this is not what I expected to be honest.  

We went to a place called Glauberg (to start) where we were dropped off on what can only be described as a back road and we walked for what I would say was about a mile and a half to a shack at the top of a hill. Nice views though!

View From Glauberg Hills

Frankfurt Skyline form Glauberg Hills

Here, we were served Brotchen (which are like sandwiches, but without a top on!) and drinks, ranging from water to apple juice to beer!!  (typical German!).  We then continued to hike for a further mile and a half to a museum, which was about Celts  (Woo!)

We had a guided tour..
to paint a picture..

1)I was tired..  having had a stressful week with home stuff, I fell asleep at 2 the morning before, and was awake at 6
2) I had just walked 3 miles, not amazingly far, but after 12 hours sleep over the last 4 days..  pretty tough
3)i was walking and listening and talking German. Some people struggle to understand, that the mental capacity to Listen, translate, understand, formulate response, translate and speak all so that the conversation doesn't lose flow is OK in bursts, but after 4 hours of it....  its tiring..   (hopefully fellow FSAs will know what I mean here!)

so .. the guided tour....

She spoke with a general speed of about 25 words per second, and similar to Faust, by the time I had translated the first sentence, she has then gone on to say around about 4 more so I understood some of it...

Big shout out to the teacher though, (and it did make me laugh) who then asked for a summary of the tour...    He is an English teacher, and must have been able to read my facial expression like a treat!

The View from the Museum Cafe

After this, we went to a town (I suppose you can call it) Called Budigen and had a coffee , then went to a Restaurant for a Meal.

Budigen 'town' center

Very nice restaurant!

I enjoyed this part...  we had a nice meal and I sat with the younger staff , enjoyed a few beers and talked about nothing sensible.  Which was nice!

On Saturday, I went to Frankfurt , and met up with another FSA.  He was pretty desperate to do something called the Ebbelwie Express , (translated as Apple-wine Express). This is an old tram, that costs EUR7.50 . With this , you get a ride of about an hour round trip, a bottle of apple wine and a packet of mini pretzels.

Not bad really!

Well, it can't exactly be called a sight-seeing tour. The tram (obviously) has to follow the tram lines, which in Frankfurt are more for practicality that tourism. There is one good view though...

The View from the Tram

What I can say it is, is a fairly relaxing hour on a tram that isn't very discreet (it looks like a circus on wheels!), that plays very loud, garish and stereo typically German Music. Nevertheless, it was enjoyable.

The Tram!

Apple wine, by the way, tastes very similar to a not-too-dry Cornish Cider.  The leaflet actually says "This Cider is now a world famous Wine" ..   Well..   Okay then!

We also went back to my Little corner of England in Germany (in the form of the Irish pub) and had a pint.
After the Pint, I clearly had some Dutch Courage and decided to go up the Bloody great tower.
The Lift travels at 20kph  and once you are up there..  its pretty windy..  but Frankfurt at night...

Frankfurt at night from the Main Tower 

 So a good weekend then really...   And the F1 topped it off.. a Second for Massa was great..  Ignoring the Winner and the non-finishing Ferrari.. :P


This next part, it to satisfy The University of Sunderland - as part of my 'reflective Diaries'

its not tough to live tough here
the language is fast
the Germans like beer
hate Lufthansa strikes
they have an unhealthy obsession with fizzy water
and their shops are weird

Oh, and all that Cultural awareness we did before we came??  total and utter Bull...   probably would have been better to teach us something useful??  

If that isn't reflective..

Just for you , Jo! :D


So.. Im not sure when I will next update this..  so - Stay safe all,
Turrah!